I guess the best thing to do is just put it right out there.
I haven't been feeling well at all. I keep working because it takes my mind off not feeling well.
We did another PET scan on Tuesday. This test is about the best thing technologically, we have to see what cancer is doing in the body. You don't eat any carbs or sugars for 48 hours and just before the scan, they inject you with radiated glucose. The sugar in the glucose is attracted to cancer cells and with the radiation, it lights up on the scan anywhere there is a measurable amount of cancer.
I met with my Doc on Wednesday. It has spread to the liver, more lymph nodes in the abdomen and something about the kidneys but I stopped hearing much that was being said to me about there.
I got the news today that my CA-125, the blood work they do to determine the rise or fall of the ovarian cancer cells present, is on the rise and back up to where it started two years ago in the 4000 range. Remember that normal is zero to 15. Not too good.
So, what does that tell us? Well, the chemo I have been taking isn't working. So we start a new chemo on Monday and we are going to do it every day... Monday through Friday. Then we will take another look at the blood levels and make sure it is working.
No, its not a picnic, but at least I still have options.
I still love my doctor and you know what? He really cares about me. I love his nurse and same thing, she really cares about me.
I am trusting that they will do whatever they can to help me and if they can't, well... maybe I will take my precious Hubbie to Paris and kiss him under the Eiffle tower.
The prognosis is as yet unknown....and I have a crystal ball. (Damned thing doesn't work.)
I am so sorry. I really wish it could be all rainbows and unicorns... but life is tough sometimes and we just have to roll with it.
Amp up those prayers.. I know you will... and I will do my part. I will show up for chemo and keep a positive attitude and see what happens. I didn't write the script, I am just here playing this role. The ending is a mystery to us both.
Please know that I am not afraid. I am surrounded by love and support. Whatever happens, is okay. No whining, no sniveling, no negativity.
Do you hear me??
I am still one of the richest people in the world.
I found true love.
I lost one child and gained two more.
I have my Mom, who lives with me.
I have 4 wonderful children.
I am rich with my extended family, my sister, brother, daughters in law, and all their extended families, cousins, aunts, uncles, step-brothers, step-cousins, step aunts... it just goes on and on...
I have 7 grandchildren!
I have friends... not hundreds, but true, real friends that I love dearly and only wish I could express to each one of them how much they are loved.
I am by far, the richest person I know.
Check this out this link below if you can. I have seen many of the TED talks but this was so beautiful .I love macro photography and this captures a bunch in a video. Hope you enjoy it and thanks Nena for sharing.
Just copy and paste the line below in your browser.
I love you.
http://www.youtube.com/v/xHkq1edcbk4?version=3
I haven't been feeling well at all. I keep working because it takes my mind off not feeling well.
We did another PET scan on Tuesday. This test is about the best thing technologically, we have to see what cancer is doing in the body. You don't eat any carbs or sugars for 48 hours and just before the scan, they inject you with radiated glucose. The sugar in the glucose is attracted to cancer cells and with the radiation, it lights up on the scan anywhere there is a measurable amount of cancer.
I met with my Doc on Wednesday. It has spread to the liver, more lymph nodes in the abdomen and something about the kidneys but I stopped hearing much that was being said to me about there.
I got the news today that my CA-125, the blood work they do to determine the rise or fall of the ovarian cancer cells present, is on the rise and back up to where it started two years ago in the 4000 range. Remember that normal is zero to 15. Not too good.
So, what does that tell us? Well, the chemo I have been taking isn't working. So we start a new chemo on Monday and we are going to do it every day... Monday through Friday. Then we will take another look at the blood levels and make sure it is working.
No, its not a picnic, but at least I still have options.
I still love my doctor and you know what? He really cares about me. I love his nurse and same thing, she really cares about me.
I am trusting that they will do whatever they can to help me and if they can't, well... maybe I will take my precious Hubbie to Paris and kiss him under the Eiffle tower.
The prognosis is as yet unknown....and I have a crystal ball. (Damned thing doesn't work.)
I am so sorry. I really wish it could be all rainbows and unicorns... but life is tough sometimes and we just have to roll with it.
Amp up those prayers.. I know you will... and I will do my part. I will show up for chemo and keep a positive attitude and see what happens. I didn't write the script, I am just here playing this role. The ending is a mystery to us both.
Please know that I am not afraid. I am surrounded by love and support. Whatever happens, is okay. No whining, no sniveling, no negativity.
Do you hear me??
I am still one of the richest people in the world.
I found true love.
I lost one child and gained two more.
I have my Mom, who lives with me.
I have 4 wonderful children.
I am rich with my extended family, my sister, brother, daughters in law, and all their extended families, cousins, aunts, uncles, step-brothers, step-cousins, step aunts... it just goes on and on...
I have 7 grandchildren!
I have friends... not hundreds, but true, real friends that I love dearly and only wish I could express to each one of them how much they are loved.
I am by far, the richest person I know.
Check this out this link below if you can. I have seen many of the TED talks but this was so beautiful .I love macro photography and this captures a bunch in a video. Hope you enjoy it and thanks Nena for sharing.
Just copy and paste the line below in your browser.
I love you.
http://www.youtube.com/v/xHkq1edcbk4?version=3
6 comments:
I love you Billie Claire, my positiveness is on vacation today.But my prayers are never ending. God hears me, I know he does.
Billie...I love you. I will keep the prayers coming. I am rich to know you :)
Days are going by and I still don't know what to say except I love you and God knows what we need and why.
Remember...we are all walking this red road together...always.
You are the picture of health and beauty to me. xo
to the woman who has taught me to laugh so everyone can hear, love without failing, and live each day without fear.... thank you, always. LOVE YOU.
Well dammit! And I hate hearing it. Prayers from people you don't even know are in abundance. I fully believe in miracles and that if anyone on this planet (or any other) can beat this - it will be you, my sweet. I love you and thank you so much for keeping us updated whether its good news or just news. You're an inspiration!
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