My father loved for his girls to have long, pretty hair and said it was your crowning glory. I have always had fine, limp and thin straight hair. I can't tell you how much I have complained about it. Give me a perm, it burns and falls out.... trendy hair cuts send me to the hat store.... but now that it is falling out like rain on my shoulders... I kinda wish I had my fine thin limp hair back. Ain't it always the way.
I visited a wig shop Monday after work... tried on everything in there that was reasonable close to my hair color, length etc. The thing is, the wigs are all thick full hair (fishing line) and it makes my head look too big. The shop owner, Mrs. Hai, kept telling me... "It look good, look good! That is what all movie stars wear, you just don't know!"
I don't want to look like a bushy headed movie star... I just want to look like me.
I bought one... and convinced by Mrs. Hai that I should wear it home and that my husband wouldn't even know the difference... I walked in to the house and found my hubbie who took one look and burst out laughing. I did too. We were rolling. I think I may just have to rock the Sinead O'Conner look and accept that other people will just know I have a disease. I am not going to fool anyone with synthetics anyway.
For now, I still have enough hair to wear it as is...and I use some hair spray so as it falls out it is glued to my head and I don't leave a trail! LOL!
I still feel really great. My next chemo is on the 6th and I suppose what hair I have left will be gone shortly there after so I am getting my head around that.
I read online about young girls with cancer that have chemo and they are made sterile. Damn. I really don't have it that bad.
I love you all for your comments and posts. Thank you for your support and for maintaining a positive outlook for me. It is powerful stuff. Really powerful. Keep it coming.
5 comments:
Good Morning Billie ! You are one gracious and powerful woman. I am so blessed to call you my friend. Your strength and positive attitude is going to get you through this girl. I wish so badly I could take it away from you, but in the end- your fight, determination and faith in God will heal you and you will come back stronger and better than ever. I love you dearly and I am here for you anytime-24/7 no matter what time of day. Let us know when your up for some company and Bo and I will come over and LAUGH and enjoy a great visit with you and Charlie. You keep your wonderful spirit, positive attitude and that love for Charlie burning in your heart and get well soon. Love you and will pray for you every single day ! TJ
Billie-
I think it is wonderful that you've seized control of how you want to communicate during this bumpy season of life. As your friends and family this gives us a clearer picture of how to be concerned, express it, but not become a burden to you
I've heard experts on some of my radio stations talk about how friends are tempted to respond with "their cancer story" in an attempt to show empathy. While well meaning it can seem to trivialize the uniqueness of each. As you say, every cancer is different and each journey is different.
The bottom line is we need to be what you need us to be.
Your blog is wonderful! It gives a peek into your mind and soul that we would likely not have through social conversation. I never knew that you were such a wonderful writer and reading your thoughts has actually encouraged me, when it really should be the other way around.
You are loved by friends, family, and God. My prayer is that you discover that more in the coming months than you ever realized before.
Your favorite brother-in-law, John F
Morning Lovey,
Glad to hear that your feeling better after your first round of Chemo. Hopefully you will continue to feel ok, after a few days rest each time.
Thinking about your hair loss,You will be beautiful even after it is all gone. I have known of two people that underwent chemo and suffered total hair loss and when their hair came back in later it looked like my mother had a hold of them! It grew back in with tight curls. I don't know if you remember but if you don't, look at some old old pictures and look at my hair......Glory Be, It was Shirley Temple. My mother must have adored her, because all of my pictures from infancy through probably the 6th grade looked like I had stuck my finger in a light socket.It is a wonder I wasn't bald too. But alas, I too have hair like yours, fine, limp and wouldn't hold a curl if you used an atomic curling iron.
I can hear Bubba Bill now, girl, you don't need hair to be beautiful, my little girl is always beautiful but remember.....use your Miracol!!!
Thinking of you daily and sending you love and hugs. Hang in there. Dixie
Hello friend, Thank you for being a blessing to so many people and for the blog. With love, Joni
Billie,
I can only guess how hard this is for you and Charlie. I am glad you can both laugh at things such as the wig! Keep your sense of humor and your love for each other. This will help you through this difficult time. I love ya and miss you. Cathy K
Post a Comment